After a week of studying and participating in sessions led by Cole Parke-West and Lenny Duncan at Holden Village in July of 2023, I had to write a devotion about ritual. Thank you to both of them for inspiring the following reflection.
Some Christians may feel uncomfortable with the word “ritual.” It is as if Christians tell ourselves that what we do on Sunday morning is not ritualistic. The term “ritualistic” seems to be more often associated with non-Christian spiritual practices. In my journey to become a pastor, I had to learn rituals before they performed a ritual on me that qualified me to professionally conduct rituals. If you lost me in that last sentence… I studied at a seminary for five years, went through a ministry candidacy process, earned a Master of Divinity, and was ordained as a Pastor. Those five years were the most Christocentric and ritualistic years of my life.
I’ll take off my pastor’s hat and put on my other hat. The hat I wear when I speak about my bipolar type 1 diagnosis. In order for me to live well with bipolar disorder, I have developed rituals. When I was in residential treatment for five months in 2010, they called it AMR (morning routine) and PMR (evening routine). In the morning, getting out of bed, eating, showering, putting on fresh clothing, and having five minutes of reflective time is optimal. If you don’t have a mood disorder, this may seem basic. I had to learn the basic practices of life. For me, the most important part of PMR is taking my medication at the same time. I haven’t missed it in 13 years. Right before bed, I am in the bathroom, and I lay the pills out and I take them. For 13 years, I have not had to go back into the psych ward.
Here’s my point: It has taken a long time for me to understand that there is intentionality to meaningful self-care. Self-care can be a ritual. That is what AMR and PMR have essentially become to me… self-care rituals. The term “self-care” gets thrown around a lot. Self-care is often a suggestion that feels like a bandaid on a compound fracture. From my perspective, self-care is something that I began building in 2010. Right now, I am just beginning to understand what I have built.
So for anyone at the beginning of their wellness journey, I would urge you to start small. I live a life full of meaningful rituals, but I started with AMR and PMR. Many people that are young in recovery are blasted with the need for immediate physical, emotional, spiritual, and behavioral self-care. All crammed into 28 days of intense therapy and support groups from dawn till dusk. All that can be overwhelming. Start with one ritual at a time.
Patient spirit, allow us to build something unique with you as we seek our own rituals.
